Monday, September 3, 2007

Rant 2: Dr. Reality Check to ER...

So. I took some readers advice regarding how to get rid of Klingons, and not the Star Trek type. Some of you offered really good advice; some of you couldn't advise your way out of a wet paper bag. Either way; the advice that I took, and the other steps I took of my own devising... haven't been successful. There is something, it turns out, mighty powerful about denial and the magnitude of the human ego that just allows people to turn "GO. AWAY. I-DON'T-LIKE-YOU" into something that resounds within their minds as "I'm grouchy today, call me tomorrow, I love you". Good gods.

So. I was stuck in the middle of nowhere for 3 weeks. I got to see plenty of hot, hoooot guys (where I was, we had no privacy. Open tents, open shower, open toilettes...) but not much in the way of action (which is not to say none), and little to do in our free time.

And guess what I got to deal with when I checked my e-mail.

Here it goes:


***** Begin E-mail*****


From: ********** Mailed-By: gmail.com
To: *********
Date: Aug 27, 2007 3:21 PM
Subject: Dude, hello....?

Can i just say though; what was really difficult was knowing you could have sex with me one day and know that is was nothing to you....that you could just go and have sex with another guy, and then another any other time and I was absolutely nothing to you.

that said...regardless of how you feel toward me, I will be in Seattle this weekend. I hope we can hook up. I am going to LeFeaux at Julia's with my friends on Saturday night. I am buying an extra ticket for you. If you show up that would be great. If you don't, then I guess you don't.

I have already bought the ticket. If you don't want anything to do with me, then tell me so I can give the ticket to someone else. I hope that is not the case, but when I'm ignored on purpose like this, 90% of the time, it is the case.

XYZ


***** End E-mail*****


Now, you have to have a serious mind block to be doing something like this. It was almost two weeks before I was able to check my e-mail for the first time. I had a total of 34 missed messages from him. Some were funnier, most more pathetic, than the one above, but none details the pathos of the situation than this one.


So, he hasn't spoken to me in weeks. I was out of country (not that I told him that, hell I didn't even have time to tell my beloved readers, and he was far down the list from them), and not inclined to deal with drama from 9,000 miles away. But, when I got the latest e-mail in the series, and it says "I bought you a ticket even though you ignore me and I want you to come", that speaks to me of serious psychological and stalker issues. Furthermore, I don't appreciate having the time and money spent on the ticket used as a guilt-lever in an attempt to force my hand into a situation I have no desire to be in.

Men, I tell you this. If you are the type who wears your heart on your sleave and fall for a guy that you have hot sex with the very first time, you have issues. Period. Some of you told me I was a calous asshole and was mean to the guy, others told me I was spot on. My turn. If you think that sharing a meal and then fucking for a few hours equates to a fucking ring on the finger, wake up and grow a goddamn brain. Its sex. Period. Granted, many people, even myself, attach emotion to it, but thats ridiculous. NO ONE should think they have claim or expectations after A NIGHT. One. Uno. To think that, you are kidding yourself. If you both think there is something there afterwards and want to pursue it, thats one thing. But to think there is an expectation for the other party to, is pathetic.

A hookup is not meant to be the way to meet your husband. A fuck is not the way to look for your next love. For all you bottoms, and occasional tops I suppose, out there who took his side, then I tell you this: you do not live in the real world and your expectations on life and love are seriously skewed. More so, if you don't believe me, see a psychiatrist. I can guarantee you they will say you have serious emotional dependency issues if you think a night of play means he has to love you and become one. Get a grip!

Anyway, thats my rant. I spent most of last night, up until about 0400, balls deep in a boy or three. I'll fill you in soon, but for now... I'm taking a nap.


~Mike

Send Mike an E-mail

3 comments:

wolveriner said...

That guy was a total stalker. People gotta realise that sex is sex. Sex and relationship can be exclusive.

Sex and relationship require mutual interest and he can't force you into a relationship just cuz it was a good shag.

Pete said...

hey, mike. i would like to send you an email but the email mike button doesnt work on my friends mac. i would like to send you a photo for the contest. you havent picked a winner and i really think i have a shot. anyway, please dont post this comment. and shoot me an email at arsehigh@gmail.com

Anonymous said...

You're right about feeling stalked and pressured into making decisions based on guilt. But, you're beginning to border on cruelty by calling him out so often and you're enabling him by doing so in a public manner. Now, I am NO psychiatrist but I would have suggested the following:
1) Set his email address to automatically get bounced or sent to Trash;
2) Send him a very formal email (if you haven't done so already) telling him of the possible legal consequences should he continue to harrass you;
3) Keep an eye out to see if he is INDEED stalking/following you. If so, notify police and file a complaint.

I know this all sounds like a pussy way of doing things but I have found that when people are enabled (answering his emails privately or publicly IS enabling) they respond, no matter what your tone is. No one wants to feel ignored but when we are ignored it is sometimes the slap in the face we need.

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